hey tjejen, jag saknar dig väldigt mycket. Jag var lite hård mot dig men jag kunde inte hjälpa mig själv när du bröt det löfte som jag tror det viktigaste i mitt liv. Jag visste att jag lekte med dig dessa dagar. De flesta av de saker som jag gjorde mot dig är bara för skojs skull.
Jag är en sorts person som beslutar saker baserat på mitt mitt hjärta och mitt sinne. Jag började älska dig, när jag slutar mottagna meddelanden från dig och när du slutar ta hand om mig. Jag kände mig värre, när man inte brydde sig eller meddelande mig.
Jag brukade vänta på dina meddelanden varje dag, men blev blek när jag inte har haft dem under hela dagen. Jag var mycket stark på mitt beslut och även beslutat att inte svara dig, men min kärlek till dig låt min egoes gå ner mot dig.
Jag visste att du älskade mig väldigt mycket i början, men senare utvecklades till hat mot mig, på grund av mina handlingar mot dig.
Jag minns fortfarande dagen då jag träffade dig och började också jaga för dig. Jag också fortfarande håller bilder av dig som vi tog tillsammans i skolan och dessutom sparat SMS som vi skickar till varandra. Jag kan inte glömma dig i mitt liv ..
Det roligaste är att jag började älska dig, när du hatade mig. Sen lärde jag mig vikten av att du och även kände hur svårt för dig att närma mig. Jag minns de dagar när du använde för att komma till vår klass för att besöka mig och vänta utanför för att se mig. Jag visste inte ens respekterar dina känslor som var mycket dåligt av mig.
Jag gillar hur du pratar, jag gillar sättet du skriker, jag gillar sättet du fram till mig. men jag vet inte om ni ser mig som din vän, men nu ser jag dig som min. Jag kan inte sluta tänka på dig.
Jag älskar dig tjejen.
English Translation:
hey girl, I miss you very much. I was little harsh on you but I couldn't help myself when you broke the promise which I think the most important thing in my life. I knew that I was playing around with you these days. Most of the things which I did against to you is only for fun.
I am a kind of person who decides things based upon my my heart and my mind. I started loving you, when I stop recieved messages from you and when you stop caring for me. I felt worse, when you didn't care or message me.
I used to wait for your messages every day, but turned pale when I haven't had them for the whole day. I was very strong upon my decisions and also decided not to respond to you, but my love towards you let my egoes go down against you.
I knew you loved me very much in the beginning, but later it developed into hate towards me, because of my acts against you.
I still remember the day, when I met you and also started chasing for you. I also still hold the pictures of you which we took together in school and also saved the sms's which we send to each other. I cannot forget you in my life..
The funniest thing is I started loving you, when you hated me. Then I learnt the importance of you and also felt how hard for you to approach me. I remembered the days, when you used to come to our class to visit me and also wait outside to see me. I didn't even respect your feelings which was very bad of me.
I like the way you talk, I like the way you shout, I like the way you approached me. but I don't know whether you see me as your friend, but now I see you as my lover. I cannot stop thinking of you.
love you girl.
today I had an interesting joke from alicia. Once after we left, I went to the volley ball tournament and happened to see her and gave her the letter which I wrote earlier for her, also I mentioned her there is nothing to do with the letter anymore.. later I questioned her abt her markings in her left hand, which I was curious in these days.. remember I wanted u guys to see those markings on the other day.. today I found an extra symbol underneath the letter, surprisingly it's an heartin symbol. when I questioned her she said that she put her friends letter on her hand.. now she contradict to what she spoke on the other day... aha aha ah-- I enjoy seeing when people pretend or lie :P:P
ReplyDeleteI never knew fate plays a major role in my life. I really never knew why she avoided me. She did every shit and finally said that she wanted to be my friend. I hate the moment she said it to me. You know my mind, either it needs or rejects. I went for her again and her words which turned me down to take the negative thing. Now I didn't even message to her or even talk to her, though we see each other in SFI. It sounds like hell in heaven. ME, I can't give up for any reason, because I believe some thing is better than this and everything changes. By this time when I was in esbjerg I was mad at yannina, but now I don't even think about her. Things changes, Hopefully this girl also get out of my memory by next year, unless we don't see each other for a long time. The first thing for the pain or love is when we stay close to each other. You move to different poles, you'll forget the person. This is how nature works with humans. Distance we are, sure you loose the interest. I even lost the interest to kårin when I went to denmark from sweden. Again it got into life, when I returned back here in sweden again, so this is how the human relations work. I dunno whether its respect to harmones or anything which makes us to vibrate. I got a feeling when alicia came to my class for watching the movie, once she found seat in my row, next to sussane. My heart started sensing something, when she came near to me and passed back of me. so this is how the human love works. I made hard on my mind to avoid her, by engaging myself to going to my fnd's palace, but once I go to sfi, I will see her atleast once, which makes me satisfied for my search. I dont want to talk to her because the word I have given to myself should not get spoiled for any reason and this is how I live my life.. rough and rigid, but interesting. I noticed that alicia was looking after my chocolate when susanne passed to noshin and again when she passed it to me. I noticed those thinking eyes. I felt the thing which I needed from her. she must be longing for me in her life, which gives me a satisfaction for loosing a person like me.. Not to mention about elsa, I even forget her after she left to växjo. I had a feeling for that girl for the last one week in 2009.. It's been a curse for me that for every Christmas I loose one girl.
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